PCD

Well.. went to see Phillips Craig & Dean this weekend in Portland, ME. It was a great trip - My FIRST with my best girl friend, can you believe it? We've been friends for over 16 years and we never took a road trip. Shamefull if you ask me, but we had a great trip and enjoyed seeing the sights, trying to find a restaurant, and public potty's. HOLY!!

The concert was a good one, lots of good harmonies and music, a little bit "tame" for my liking, but I felt and saw Daddy that night, which is always a good night if you ask me.

And on the way back, in true road trip style we were pulled over by the Canadian Boarder patrol, and for the first time in my life they searched our vehicle. I guess if you get me & J-Mo in the same car.. stuff happens.

I love you J-Mo.. I'm so glad to have taken this trip with ya!

How Big is Your But?

I am a complainer. There I've admitted it. For anyone who knows me, knows that I sometimes enjoy a good rant. A good "tell it like it is" session. And sometimes I cling to those moments, and enjoy them a little too much.

I saw Bob Fitts last night and he had an amazing exercise - one that I want to start in my life. The exercise is called - How big is your but.. And it is based on this passage:


John 16:33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

Troubles come to all of us, every day, in many shapes and forms. The dog eats your homework, your sister steals the last of the favorite cereal, you miss the bus, or you sleep through your alarm, your best friend gets mad at you, you loose something very precious to you, you wake up in a funk, you have less $$ in the bank than you need. All of those things can trouble us, keep us from seeking Jesus, and give us depression and anxiety. The message in this verse is to remember that there is always a BIG BUT.. Jesus has overcome the world, He has set us free from our sin, He has made a way to the Father, He has adopted us as His own, He has moved heaven and earth for us, He is coming again soon to collect His children. All these things are amazing buts. No matter what the day, no matter what the situation, the Buts that we have in Jesus are SOOOO much bigger than our situations. Just how big is your but?

Still Saying the Same Thing Today

God told Abraham to go..

He Told Moses to go..

He told Jonah to go..

He told me to go...

Go.. And see my Wonders..

He's still saying the same thing. It's not a mystery, it's not irregular.. I'm not special, it's His way. Calling people out on the water with Him, challenging them beyond their ability to understand and comprehend. To put them in a position where all they can do is call out to Him in desperation. He promises wonders. WONDERS. That is such an amazing promise for the journey.

More Thoughts to come on this:

Deuteronomy 7:17
You're going to think to yourselves, "Oh! We're outnumbered ten to one by these nations! We'll never even make a dent in them!" But I'm telling you, Don't be afraid. Remember, yes, remember in detail what God, your God, did to Pharaoh and all Egypt. Remember the great contests to which you were eyewitnesses: the miracle-signs, the wonders, God's mighty hand as he stretched out his arm and took you out of there. God, your God, is going to do the same thing to these people you're now so afraid of.

Psalm 66:5
Take a good look at God's wonders— they'll take your breath away. He converted sea to dry land; travelers crossed the river on foot. Now isn't that cause for a song?

Psalm 119:17
Be generous with me and I'll live a full life; not for a minute will I take my eyes off your road. Open my eyes so I can see what you show me of your miracle-wonders. I'm a stranger in these parts; give me clear directions. My soul is starved and hungry, ravenous!— insatiable for your nourishing commands. And those who think they know so much, ignoring everything you tell them—let them have it! Don't let them mock and humiliate me; I've been careful to do just what you said. While bad neighbors maliciously gossip about me, I'm absorbed in pondering your wise counsel. Yes, your sayings on life are what give me delight; I listen to them as to good neighbors!

Life..

Well it's been an interesting week for me. One filled with anguish and turmoil, but also full of grace and the awareness that Daddy is afoot in all things and that He is teaching me some very very important lessons about security and provision.

I have been learning about my past, and the depths of fear and anxiety that lurk there just under the surface. It may never go away. It may never change, but I know that even with those conditions, my reaction has changed. Before I would react to get my own way, to claim my rights, to protect myself, and now I know that my gut reaction is to run to Dad, to beg Him for my needs and my rights and to protect me. A radical shift for me.

This passage was given to me this past weekend, in the midst of what can only be called a panic attack:

Proverbs 3:21-26
Dear friend, guard Clear Thinking and Common Sense with your life;
don't for a minute lose sight of them.
They'll keep your soul alive and well,
they'll keep you fit and attractive.
You'll travel safely,
you'll neither tire nor trip.
You'll take afternoon naps without a worry,
you'll enjoy a good night's sleep.
No need to panic over alarms or surprises,
or predictions that doomsday's just around the corner,
Because God will be right there with you;
he'll keep you safe and sound.

It is a prayer of my heart to live this way. To never allow the circumstances to change what I feel Dad is up to. To guard clear thinking, at all costs. To know who He is and who I am. And to be made aware that His bigness will overwhelm my smallness. Oh to know Him like that. Oh to have that kind of confidence. He is at work, from the inside out this week.

Out Of Sorts

Ever have a day/ week where you just feel disconnected? I just feel numb today.. not really "attached" to anything or anyone. Which is disconcerning, and I don't really enjoy feeling this way. I wonder what is wrong with me? Why am I so hard right now? Where is this coming from?

I miss the sence softness of my heart, of being vulnerable and open to all that Daddy has given me and is sending my way. It's not that I feel far from Him, or that I can't see what He's doing, I just feel so removed from it. I could try to stir it up, try to get back on track, but I know that it would be my own self effort, and that.. well it has never worked in the past.

Maybe some sleep will help, perhaps a long walk on a long beach, maybe I need a holiday - Wait.. i just had one of those! Either way, I need Him, to come and make sence of this, to give me hope in the midst of a numb week. To make me right again. To put together the part of my heart and life that I don't even understand. He is good for that. He is big enough. I know Him.

Thanksgiving 2006

When Faced With a Difficult Situation

A - Admit it.. You can't do it... You will fail if left up to your own

T - Thank God for it.. Not the actual pain, but what it is accomplishing in your life and heart, and character.

T - Trust God. Simply believe His words over your circumstance.

His Glory

Romans 8:18 I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.

I've been thinking on this verse all week. Of course this verse is relative. It would mean different things to various Christians around the world. To a believer in Sudan, it would mean living in a refugee camp, struggling for your existence, trying to save your children from starvation. That present suffering, would be incredibly difficult to hand over to the Father, and trust that He is working in and around your situation.

For an underground believer in China, that statement would mean persecution in all it's various forms, the inability to get gainful employment, the constant fear of being found out, the trauma of seeing your family and friends threatened for the cause of Christ. To think about God's glory in the midst of that situation is incredible really. To know that God is ruling and reigning regardless of the circumstances you find yourself in.

In my case, it's bitterness, jealousy and the ability to forgive and extend grace to your enemies and those who hurt you and those that you love. It's a difficult struggle to lay down your rights, and those things you desperately want to cling to, but Daddy is faithful. He is more than able to conquer my selfish state, He can create a new heart in mine, and lead me to calm waters and beautiful places once again. He is working out my life for His glory. He will never leave me in a circumstance without knowing that it will fully change my character. To trust Him in the midst of those circumstances is a trying, but beautiful thing. Oh to do it fully with abandon.