Life..

Well it's been an interesting week for me. One filled with anguish and turmoil, but also full of grace and the awareness that Daddy is afoot in all things and that He is teaching me some very very important lessons about security and provision.

I have been learning about my past, and the depths of fear and anxiety that lurk there just under the surface. It may never go away. It may never change, but I know that even with those conditions, my reaction has changed. Before I would react to get my own way, to claim my rights, to protect myself, and now I know that my gut reaction is to run to Dad, to beg Him for my needs and my rights and to protect me. A radical shift for me.

This passage was given to me this past weekend, in the midst of what can only be called a panic attack:

Proverbs 3:21-26
Dear friend, guard Clear Thinking and Common Sense with your life;
don't for a minute lose sight of them.
They'll keep your soul alive and well,
they'll keep you fit and attractive.
You'll travel safely,
you'll neither tire nor trip.
You'll take afternoon naps without a worry,
you'll enjoy a good night's sleep.
No need to panic over alarms or surprises,
or predictions that doomsday's just around the corner,
Because God will be right there with you;
he'll keep you safe and sound.

It is a prayer of my heart to live this way. To never allow the circumstances to change what I feel Dad is up to. To guard clear thinking, at all costs. To know who He is and who I am. And to be made aware that His bigness will overwhelm my smallness. Oh to know Him like that. Oh to have that kind of confidence. He is at work, from the inside out this week.